Cross and Branston home > backlash

Perfectly reasonable feedback, surely

A though I had this evening, as I sampled some Branston pickle, prompted me to write this letter. I doubt I would ever send it (unless I get many requests to do so).

To Cross and Blackwell
Makers of Branston Pickle

Dear Mr Branston,

I have always enjoyed Branston pickle, and buy several jars each year for use in sandwiches or to go with jacket potatoes. I am a big fan of the product and thought I might offer you some feedback on my recent experience with your pickle.

I currently have a mouth ulcer. This had not caused me much bother, until I had a forkful of Branston pickle this evening. The pickle was quite acidic and attacked the ulcer, making it sting quite badly. Of course, one should use Bonjela (or other similar treatments) when one has a mouth ulcer, but have you ever tried Bonjela on a cheese sandwich? It spreads onto the bread quite badly and tastes more of liquorice than a savoury sandwich adornment should.

So, I thought, why not combine the soothing balms of Bonjela with the savoury tastiness of Branston? Why not make a pickle that soothes mouth ulcers and teething? You have to admit, it's a pretty original idea.

Obviously, I'm no expert. I have no idea, for instance, how such a product might taste, or how it might be marketed. However, I'm sure that Cross and Blackwell, with time, patience and wisdom, would be able to make a real go of this idea. So, I'll give it to you for free - do with it as you will.

I look forward to the changes in pickles or pharmacy aisles in my local Asda.

Yours sincerely,

 

Ashley Frieze.

20 November 2001
Ashley Frieze